On Tue, 2 Feb 1999, ho goht wrote:
hi, i'm not a prankster who doesn't have anything better to do than do anything, i'm just Mr nothing on a everything world ...by queer coincidence, i happened to click on your web link from webcrawler search cos i searched for nothing....so why am i saying all these..could it be for something,,,i guess not cos i just have this to say to you.....YOU MUST BE A GOOD PEOPLE 'S GAME PLAYER .......i said something but now it's ( ).
To which I responded:
I'm not sure what "A GOOD PEOPLE 'S GAME PLAYER" is but it seems too extreme for someone like me. I like to just sit back and do nothing.
Xymyl (KON)
Friday, December 7, 2007
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Q&A Archive: Nothing Y2K Compliant?
On Thu, 21 Jan 1999, Don wrote:
Hi. I was impressed with nothing at your site. You have, by far, exceeded my expectations with respect to nothing and I felt compelled to comment on nothing at all.
I have been using nothing for years, and until recently, nothing was acceptable. But, I have a question; Is nothing Y2K compliant? Can I get a certified letter stating that nothing is Y2K? On Jan 1, 2000, will nothing function? I depend on nothing for almost everything. My wife thinks about nothing all day. My kids play with nothing, and I make my living getting better and better at nothing each day. (No I don't work for the government - I'm not that good at doing nothing).
I need more. Where can I get next to nothing?
To which I replied:
Don,
I'm glad you were impressed by nothing. Some may say that one who is impressed by nothing is easily impressed. If you know nothing like I do, you understand how difficult it can be to get all worked up over "it".
So, someone who is impressed by nothing is hardly impressed. (That is as opposed to easily (however not opposed as in opposite, just different.)
I'm glad to hear you and your family have been enjoying our products. (I use the term products in the sense far beyond the loosest possible sense, and by such statement mean lack thereof.) Nonetheless I enjoy hearing positive feedback about nothing (it's really difficult to come by these days).
Now on to your Y2K problem.
If you mean nothing at all...
I can not guarantee that nothing will work on (or after) January 1, 2000. In fact, it is my painful obligation to inform you that some things will be working that day. I could go into exhaustive detail... but... actually I don't have the time (so I can't).
If you mean nothing in general...
Yes, you have my guarantee that nothing will function on into eternity. Nothing lasts forever. Nothing will function perfectly, forever. Nothing will have nothing to do with the Y2K problems that will pop up shortly. In fact, on effected systems mission critical data may be lost, systems may fail, programs may halt or have fatal errors.
What does this mean? Nothing. No more errors, blue screens, lockups, shutdowns, disconnects, routeflaps, collisions, fragments, truncations... I could go on and on... but... actually...
Yes, January 1, 2000 is install nothing day! It's not a Y2K problem it's NO/OS extravaganza! A black hole blowout! I could go on and on...
If I only had the time.
Anyway, no, you can't get a certified letter nothing will work because it could be taken to mean that everything will stop.
All I'm saying is something will go wrong ... but never nothing.
Xymyl (KON)
P.S. I take exception to your statement about government workers being good at doing nothing. Yes, there are some government workers who seem to be doing nothing, but how did they get there? That's right, they had to walk to the bus.
Hi. I was impressed with nothing at your site. You have, by far, exceeded my expectations with respect to nothing and I felt compelled to comment on nothing at all.
I have been using nothing for years, and until recently, nothing was acceptable. But, I have a question; Is nothing Y2K compliant? Can I get a certified letter stating that nothing is Y2K? On Jan 1, 2000, will nothing function? I depend on nothing for almost everything. My wife thinks about nothing all day. My kids play with nothing, and I make my living getting better and better at nothing each day. (No I don't work for the government - I'm not that good at doing nothing).
I need more. Where can I get next to nothing?
To which I replied:
Don,
I'm glad you were impressed by nothing. Some may say that one who is impressed by nothing is easily impressed. If you know nothing like I do, you understand how difficult it can be to get all worked up over "it".
So, someone who is impressed by nothing is hardly impressed. (That is as opposed to easily (however not opposed as in opposite, just different.)
I'm glad to hear you and your family have been enjoying our products. (I use the term products in the sense far beyond the loosest possible sense, and by such statement mean lack thereof.) Nonetheless I enjoy hearing positive feedback about nothing (it's really difficult to come by these days).
Now on to your Y2K problem.
If you mean nothing at all...
I can not guarantee that nothing will work on (or after) January 1, 2000. In fact, it is my painful obligation to inform you that some things will be working that day. I could go into exhaustive detail... but... actually I don't have the time (so I can't).
If you mean nothing in general...
Yes, you have my guarantee that nothing will function on into eternity. Nothing lasts forever. Nothing will function perfectly, forever. Nothing will have nothing to do with the Y2K problems that will pop up shortly. In fact, on effected systems mission critical data may be lost, systems may fail, programs may halt or have fatal errors.
What does this mean? Nothing. No more errors, blue screens, lockups, shutdowns, disconnects, routeflaps, collisions, fragments, truncations... I could go on and on... but... actually...
Yes, January 1, 2000 is install nothing day! It's not a Y2K problem it's NO/OS extravaganza! A black hole blowout! I could go on and on...
If I only had the time.
Anyway, no, you can't get a certified letter nothing will work because it could be taken to mean that everything will stop.
All I'm saying is something will go wrong ... but never nothing.
Xymyl (KON)
P.S. I take exception to your statement about government workers being good at doing nothing. Yes, there are some government workers who seem to be doing nothing, but how did they get there? That's right, they had to walk to the bus.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Q&A Archive: Expensive Shirts?
On Mon, 18 Jan 1999, Killboy Powerhead wrote:
> why are your tshirts so fu**ing expensive?
To which I replied:
Because we waste so much time answering e-mail.
--Xymyl
> why are your tshirts so fu**ing expensive?
To which I replied:
Because we waste so much time answering e-mail.
--Xymyl
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Hatemail Archive: You can't do nothing...
On Tue, 5 Jan 1999, Jonathan Davis wrote:
i hate to be the one to tell you, but you can't do nothing without dying. if you truly want to do nothing don't breath,suffucate, eat, starve, sleep, stay awake, die, or live.
dumb ass.
To which I replied:
Johnny,
I hate to be the one to tell you this but...
You state, "you can't do nothing without dying" which is a double negative. That could mean either you can do anything without dying, you can do anything while alive, you must do something without dying, you must do something instead of dying, or you can do nothing with dying.
Let's examine these briefly:
1) you can do anything without dying
This statement is incorrect. I could jump off a tall building, tie dynamite to my head and ignite it, get hit by a bus etc...
2) you can do anything while alive
This is also a false statement. I can't go to the sun, or be completely eaten by maggots while alive (I could go on and on).
3) you must do something without dying
This is a lie. Whoever told you this should be shot while skiing. I've heard of people who died while flying or falling. In fact, it seems that you must be doing something if you are going to die.
4) you must do something instead of dying
This also is a total falsehood. I could choose to die, to live and die later on, or even to die while drinking my favorite wine.
5) you can do nothing with dying
This also is not entirely correct. Although you can do nothing while dying, you generally end up doing more than ever before. Many a mans last days are far busier than his earlier days. With trips to the hospital, calling 911, often speaking to the police, getting limbs amputated, I could go on and on... I think you get the idea.
I'm sure there are many more meanings for this sentence. You can be sure whatever they are, they will all prove you wrong (and probably stupid).
Xymyl (KON)
i hate to be the one to tell you, but you can't do nothing without dying. if you truly want to do nothing don't breath,suffucate, eat, starve, sleep, stay awake, die, or live.
dumb ass.
To which I replied:
Johnny,
I hate to be the one to tell you this but...
You state, "you can't do nothing without dying" which is a double negative. That could mean either you can do anything without dying, you can do anything while alive, you must do something without dying, you must do something instead of dying, or you can do nothing with dying.
Let's examine these briefly:
1) you can do anything without dying
This statement is incorrect. I could jump off a tall building, tie dynamite to my head and ignite it, get hit by a bus etc...
2) you can do anything while alive
This is also a false statement. I can't go to the sun, or be completely eaten by maggots while alive (I could go on and on).
3) you must do something without dying
This is a lie. Whoever told you this should be shot while skiing. I've heard of people who died while flying or falling. In fact, it seems that you must be doing something if you are going to die.
4) you must do something instead of dying
This also is a total falsehood. I could choose to die, to live and die later on, or even to die while drinking my favorite wine.
5) you can do nothing with dying
This also is not entirely correct. Although you can do nothing while dying, you generally end up doing more than ever before. Many a mans last days are far busier than his earlier days. With trips to the hospital, calling 911, often speaking to the police, getting limbs amputated, I could go on and on... I think you get the idea.
I'm sure there are many more meanings for this sentence. You can be sure whatever they are, they will all prove you wrong (and probably stupid).
Xymyl (KON)
Monday, December 3, 2007
Hatemail Archive: Stupid!
On Wed, 5 Aug 1998 blueie@webtv.net wrote:
> YOU People are veary stupd
To which I quipped:
That may be but we can spell.
> YOU People are veary stupd
To which I quipped:
That may be but we can spell.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Q&A Archive: For real?
On Wed, 15 Jul 1998, RON & WILMA OLSON wrote:
> Are you really for REAL?
To which I replied:
No, not really. Wait I take that back... it only costs five dollars U.S.
to find out.
> Are you really for REAL?
To which I replied:
No, not really. Wait I take that back... it only costs five dollars U.S.
to find out.
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Q&A Archive: Good question!
On Sat, 11 Jul 1998, kathi ricci wrote:
To which I replied:
Good question.
The answer is as follows:
To which I replied:
Good question.
The answer is as follows:
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