On Feb 17, 2007, at 11:13 AM, Curious in Missouri wrote:
Has anyone ever actually mailed you a check?
To which I replied:
Of course people send us checks! How would they buy nothing without money? I don't think you understand the world of finance. You see the marketplace is full of goods and services. People all over the world believe they have something someone else wants, and if they believe hard enough then it comes true, then they sell the thing that everybody now thinks they want. But if you have nothing to sell it is best just to be honest with yourself and everyone else. In the world of something, anything and everything goes. Advertisers and corporations can lie about the product or services they offer and nothing can be done about it. That's where we come in, we are perfectly positioned to do nothing about it.
Nothing isn't a product, so even if we chose to lie, we would be lying about nothing, which is almost better than telling the truth. The truth is that nothing in the world marketplace is very good and by selling nothing we are able to cut down on shipping expenses and pass the savings on to you. That's why nothing is still only $5.00 (US) after more than 11 years on the internet and an eternity in the universal marketplace. You try to find a deal like that anywhere else in the universe and you won't, you know why? Because we looked for it and it doesn't exist. That's why people are willing to fill out forms longhand and mail us checks.
Of course, some people want to show support for nothing by by buying one of our tee-shirts. Because shirts are something, they cost more than nothing but if you have to spend money on something it may as well be something about nothing. Plus, once you have the shirt in your possession you can do whatever you want with it for the rest of eternity with no further payments. And that's not all, when you buy a tee-shirt that says nothing on it you also get nothing, hey, just because you bought something doesn't mean you can't also get nothing! And in this limited time offer (which has been going on since the beginning of time) when you buy nothing you also get our instruction booklet free! This 32 page booklet makes nothing easy! After just a few days, you'll see that there is nothing like nothing. Impress your friends or your lack of friends when they (or -they) find out how little money it takes to no longer have that little bit of money but instead have nothing and a free book about how to use nothing, do nothing, wear nothing and more (or less).
Saturday, February 17, 2007
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